Tuesday, June 15, 2010

God Is God...And I Am Not.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

Tomorrow morning I am flying to Orlando. The purpose of this trip: Buy a house. At least, that was the purpose of the trip when I booked the ticket 3 weeks ago. But sometimes plans change. And sometimes I don't like the change. Sometimes I actually hate the change, and can do nothing but acknowledge that God is God and I am not. He knows what He is doing, and He knows that the plans He has for me are for my good, whether I like them or not.

I won't go into specifics, but due to a bizarre set of circumstances, a recent change in Florida mortgage law, and a really horrid company called Wells Fargo Home Mortgage, we are not able to get a new home loan until January.

So, Plan B involves finding a rental property that is $1000/month or less, will allow us to have our cats, is in one of our preferred school districts, and will be available August 1st.

Honestly, I don't even know what to feel about this trip. Instead of having a realtor doing all the work and setting up showings for me, I am on my own. No realtor to make the phone calls. No realtor to drive me around town. Just me, exploring a new place in my little rental car, and trying to get appointments set up to look at rentals. I am so tired, so stressed out by this.

All I can really do is lean on God. I have no strength, no ability to do this on my own. In fact, I'm beginning to wonder if maybe God planned it this way in order to remind me to rely on Him completely. He has firmly closed doors to us buying a house right now, and I just need to keep in mind that God does indeed see the future, and I can't. He knows the outcome of this trip, and I don't. He has a home picked out for us, even as I will be trying to find it. He is already in Florida. He has called us there. He will go with me to Florida, and will give me wisdom and guidance while I am there. God is just so cool like that!

I feel like recently my blog has been a bulletin board of Emily's prayer requests. But I understand the power of prayer, and I am so thankful to know that the people who are reading this are praying for me. Thanks, y'all. The end of this journey is in sight. Thanks for praying me through the thick of it.


RachelRuelas said...

I will be praying!! I know the perfect situation will arise. God is good.

Lori said...

Oh girl, I'm so sorry. Praying for peace and encouragement while you're there! :)

Stef said...

oh Em, I am SO sorry! :( What a huge bummer. And I know it sounds so cheesy to say it, but we have to remember in times like these, God has a better plan! For whatever reason (and HE has a good reason) this wasn't His timing for you to buy a house. I imagine within time, it will all be clear to you guys.

I will be praying! (and using your site for a prayer request bulletin is just fine!) Keep us posted on the trip.

ps. we hate Wells Fargo too ;)

E. Charlotte said...

I will send prayers your direction. I feel for you in your situation. The situation I have found myself in recently is not the same, but your blog still gave me hope. I too must remember that God can see the future, and I cannot. Thank you for speaking the truth. I need to remember to rely on Him too. :)

4Eva & Always said...

Wow. I need to let you know that I needed to hear every word of what you just said. While I'm going through something very different your words spoke so clearly to me. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

4Eva & Always said...

I linked this post to my blog, I felt it needs to be shared. I hope that is ok!

Southern Belle said...

Oh gosh, I am so sorry to hear this Emily. I love your post title, pretty much sums up what I've learned the last nine months too.

You can be sure I am praying the Lord provides the perfect rental in the perfect place for you. Sometimes real estate agents will help locate rentals. We got a couple of our rentals that way. {the better ones} It might be worth asking...saves a LOT of time too!

BTW, like many, we're not fans of Wells Fargo either.

Tara said...

Hoping you have a safe and successful trip. I'm sure you are there by now but I will say a prayer for you! At least the house in AR has sold...that is awesome!

Jenn said...

Praying for you guys! In reading what God has done already I know He has the perfect house for you. I'll pray for complete peace and that you'll actually enjoy this time in FL. Love ya!

momto5minnies said...

I can imagine your frustrations. Having moved to 4 different completely "new to me" states, I know what it is like to simply pick a house(that seemed perfect) and not necessarily "know" the area. This could possibly be a blessing even though it seems more of pain. You can stay in a home and really get to scope out the area and pick a home that will be a great fit for your family.

Maybe GOD knows this.

I wish you all the best.