Friday, January 27, 2012

Lesson Learned...

I visited the dentist a few weeks back and was reminded {again} that I have horrible teeth. The dentist strongly suggested that I get a Waterpik flosser. Yes, it was expensive. But yes, I love it. It's amazing how much more junk it gets out of my teeth than traditional flossing. It has also helped my gum inflammation to go down! I use Listerine in the water to help even more.

However, when using the Waterpik flosser, there are a few very important guidelines you must follow religiously. I share these rules with you based on my own experience.

1. Fill the Waterpik basin with warm water and a capful of Listerine.
2. Turn the Waterpik on and begin water flossing your teeth.
3. Bend over the sink and leave your mouth partway open so the water and gunk can drain as you floss.
4. Widely open the eye in the back of your head.
5. Don't let devious husband sneak up behind you while you're flossing with a high powered stream of warm minty water.
6. Kick devious husband in the shins before he has a chance to grab your sides and yell "BWAH!" at you while you're flossing with a high powered stream of warm minty water.
7. Never scream and drop the pik into the sink, because it doesn't turn off just because you let go of it.
8. Remember that the pik has a curly cord that will cause it to rotate toward your face if you drop it in the sink.
9. Remember that the high powered stream of warm minty water shoots a very long way when it isn't contained by the cavern of your mouth.

10. Above all, NEVER allow the Waterpik flosser to shoot a high powered stream of warm Listerine water up into your nose and sinuses as it is twisting and falling into the sink when you scream and drop it because you didn't remember to kick devious husband in the shins before he grabbed your sides and yelled because you didn't open the eye in the back of your head while you were flossing!


FYI, Listerine was not intended for use in the nose and sinuses. And neither is the Waterpik flosser.

1 comment:

Maggie Johnson said...

Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh Em.....and all at YOUR expense!