Humor in Our House

Today turned out to be a day full of laughter. That was really good for me. Things have been a little...intense...around here lately.

This morning I took Snapper to the eye doctor. Her eyes have been bothering her recently. She sees spots and patterns anytime there's a significant change in light exposure. It is the worse when she swims at night and looks up toward the stadium lights, and when she goes outside for recess or P.E. She has also been squinting a lot, and complaining that her glasses aren't working right. I laughed throughout her whole eye appointment. She was curious and funny, and got the biggest kick out of having her eyes dilated. She hammed it up, entertaining everyone in the waiting room. Her diagnosis: Terrible vision. But we already knew that. She has an astigmatism, pretty severe in her right eye and significant in her left eye. While normal, healthy vision is 20/20, Snapper's is 20/1250 in her right eye, and 20/1200 in her left eye, without glasses. Yup. Poor kid wasn't kidding when she said her glasses didn't work. She had a retinal scan, which came back normal. The spots and patterns are ocular migraines caused by sensitivity to light. They are not painful migraines, which is good. We are getting her transitions lenses, and she needs to wear a visor or hat outside.

After I picked up the kids from school, we got some new shoes for Snapper and then headed home. About halfway through homework, I cracked. I just fell apart. I work so hard to teach my kids good manners and respect for others. Today I threw manners to the wind and challenged the kids to a burping contest. *GASP* Yes folks, there was a rude fest in my living room today. For 30 minutes we gulped air and ripped some pretty impressive belches. I laughed until I had tears rolling down my cheeks. Snapper laughed until her sides hurt. Pepper laughed until he was screaming, and then he laughed so hard that no sound came out at all. We laughed more in 30 minutes than we have laughed in the last month combined! Was it terribly inappropriate? Yes! Did we need the outlet for all the nervous tension? Most definitely!

Tonight was crazy hair night at Awana. Snapper won 1st prize for the best hair! I am too tired to upload a photo now. I'll just say that it made me--and a lot of other people--laugh a lot, too.

On the way home from Awana, Matt started belching. We had another rude fest, this time with Daddy bellowing his man burps along with us. More hysterical laughter. So much better than the exhausted whining I usually am subjected to on the way home from Awana. After we were all belched out, Pepper, being in a slap-happy, silly mood, entertained us with his 5-year-old humor. Here are the jokes I remember. Oh, and picture this boy, wiggling with delight in the back seat, cracking himself up after every joke. And then imagine the laughter getting a little louder and more riotous with each new joke. We laughed not at the jokes, but at his reaction to his own "jokes."

Q: What do you call a wheel without a tire?  A: Gray polka dots!

Q: Why did the chicken run away from the Indians? A: Because there was a fox with the Indians and the fox wanted to eat the chicken!

Q: Why did the house jump over the pool? A: Because it wanted to sit on the grass.

Q: What is a wire without "electicerty?" (Yes, I meant to spell it like that, because that's how he says it!) A: A string!

Q: Why did the lake jump up and down? (Me: "I didn't know lakes could jump!" Pepper: "Silly mom, it's just a joke!")  A: Because it wanted to grow legs. (Me, whispered to Matt: "If only I'd know jumping up and down would make me grow legs! I could have had 5 legs by now!)

Q: Why did the bear?  A: Underwear!

Thanks, God, for an awesome, hilarity-packed day. We really, really needed that.